012. Our Bee-Day
European day-drinking, so civilized
This Week’s Pairing: A Pumpkinheadapolitan and Fra Gras
A two-for-one special featuring my two favorite things about the New York women: their relentless roasting of one another and their extremely confident mispronunciations and malapropisms.
It was hard to come up with a title for this issue because I wanted to honor the standout moment of the trip (Sonja icing her face in the bidet, obviously) without this email getting trapped in a spam filter, so I had to settle for honoring her beautiful pronunciation of “bee-day.” While everything else here pales in comparison to that scene — one of my all-time favorite Bravo moments — and this isn’t the better of the two RHONY London trips, this is still an elite-tier franchise that serves up elite-tier content.
Even with only two-thirds of the women present — our familiar Sonja and Luann join new cast members Heather Thomson and Carole Radziwill in the U.K., tagging along on some kind of international brand summit for Heather’s Yummie shapewear line; not-invited Ramona stays home with another new cast member, noted agoraphobe Aviva Drescher — they still manage to cram a significant amount of entertainment into a three-day trip.
Who Won the Vacation?
Ramona v. Heather
It’s a testament to the odious power of Ramona’s personality that 1) her coworkers never want to invite her on trips that involve their other business obligations, and 2) a conflict in which she’s a participant can dominate a trip she’s not attending. It’s also a testament to the assertive power of Heather’s personality that she succeeds in barring Ramona from this trip, an undertaking Bethenny will fail at in season 9 even though the conflict between Bethenny and Ramona leading up to the Mexico trip is far more intense than whatever’s going on here between Ramona and Heather.
This seems like a straightforward case of Ramona not liking the new girl, but I’m not sure what exactly it is about Heather that grates on Ramona so much. Is she envious of her youth, her professional success, her supportive husband, all of the above? Is it just that Heather is insufficiently deferential to her and doesn’t seek her approval? We’ll never know, because all Ramona does throughout these episodes is stroll around New York doing her best impression of Elon Musk pretending he’s not mad about being booed.
Heather, meanwhile, offers a clear, direct set of reasons she doesn’t want Ramona on the trip — but even if she didn’t, I think we’d all empathize with her not wanting the gargoyle to attend her international business functions.
WINNER: Heather. It’s a massive flex for a rookie to not only get away with excluding a veteran from a trip but also come out of it looking good.
Carole v. Luann
One could argue that the dynamic between Luann and Carole is also a case of a veteran disliking a new girl, but I think this is more about two personalities that simply do not click than any reality television power dynamic. Carole has all the cultural capital Luann covets, but it has little — if any — bearing on her sense of self-worth, and that drives Luann crazy. Luann drives Carole crazy in return by compulsively one-upping, undermining, and copying her.
And, much like Carole can’t help having innate confidence, Luann can’t help lacking the self-awareness required to control this instinctive response — in fact, she lacks it so thoroughly that when Heather tries to talk to her about her bizarre treatment of Carole, Luann assumes she’s talking about Ramona. Mortifying!
WINNER: Carole, who’s so self-aware it’s hard to understand what she’s doing here.
Trendwatch
While Heather would love to use this space to continue trying to make the case for her unflattering glasses, I’m using it to clown on Luann for buying a cape coat immediately after seeing Carole in one.
Regrettably Relatable
As anyone who has ever played a game with me will tell you, I don’t care about winning for winning’s sake, but if someone else wants to win too desperately, I have no choice but to destroy them. Carole’s attitude during the croquet match? Very important representation of this particular strain of antisocial behavior.
Did the State Department Issue an Apology for This?
No; as explained above, Ramona was not present.
Wise Words
This is a peak comedy era for Sonja, who made me genuinely laugh out loud several times during these episodes with gems such as:
While balking at the prices in Notting Hill: “I always envision myself on the subway, shaking a can and asking for money.” (Really brings her hoarding behaviors into clearer focus.)
While exploring various Notting Hill wares: “Everyone needs a sewing kit that matches their cereal bowl.” (Can’t dispute that!)
“There’s three things for the bidet: washing your lingerie, icing your face, and the obvious.” (Can’t dispute that either!)
What’s on Deck
Next week, we’re going back to dysfunctional extended-family travel with the New Jersey cast’s let’s-flee-Hurricane-Irene trip to California. If you have a lot of TV-watching time on your hands this upcoming week (and you’ve already watched all the incredible new Miami episodes on Peacock), it’s covered in episodes 14-17 of season 4.